the sads

The snow is falling steadily outside, with no end in sight.

I haven't exactly been depressed this winter, but I haven't exactly been happy. It has been very dark and very cold, and since my house and work are kept on the chilly side regularly, I feel like the only time I'm warm is when I'm in bed. Even in a hot shower, I can feel the heat, but underneath it all I feel the cold starting to melt away, but it never seems to melt completely. Normally I'm OK with cold, and I certainly would rather bundle up than turn up the thermostat, but this winter it's getting to me. I want to be in bed all the time.

Well, of course there is more to it than "it's dark and cold and everything sucks." I mean, there's always more that can suck.

The mayor of the City of Buffalo just released his snow removal plan a week and a half ago. Seriously. Buffalo is known for snow, but apparently this year it came as a surprise to the mayor, who decided to then ignore it for a month and a half, I guess. All I know is that I didn't see a snow plow until last week. Not one in the entire city. My car and the cars of almost everyone else have been getting stuck almost constantly. Luckily, I usually walk to work... except that no one is doing their sidewalks. My friend Alex wrote about all of this on her blog and beat me to the punch.

I have slipped on ice more times than I can count, though I fell only once. Right at the end of my street, on ice thick enough you could build walls with it. I fell right on my knees, on a Friday afternoon, and I wanted to cry for hours. Not from pain, but because I was so frustrated with the city of Buffalo, so over winter and having to walk like a duck to try and avoid falling. Even then, obviously, I could still fall.

And I am a walker. I have a long stride, and I really feel a physically need to walk, for peace of mind as well as for exercise. I need to stride to think - shuffling won't do. I can't stride for more than three or four steps, the way that the streets and sidewalks are. I walk to work, but work is close, and I have to shuffle. My leisurely walks are on hold until the weather and walking conditions improve. It is definitely having an effect on me.

Less mentally important, perhaps, but still a bummer - because of the cold and the wind, which is relentless, I have eschewed fashion for warmth. No cute tops, no nice shoes, no skirts. I just bought some really nice skirts at AmVets, and I probably won't be able to wear them for months. Instead, I have been layering sweaters, wearing the clunkiest, thickest socks and shoes I have. Still, my feet are soaked and cold most of the time.

I don't think I'm alone. I think many people in Buffalo will be welcoming the spring. I hope it gets here soon.

Until then, I really wish I could hibernate, at least for a week or two.

Comments

A Fuss said…
I love that you and I have matching blogs today. It just goes to show that winter has pervasively crushed our spirits this January.
gcotharn said…
Just wanted to mention that we have some things in common:

we both picked the balloon/spicy food question on Blogger Profile

we both like The Godfather as a favorite movie

we both like to read and write and argue respectfully(i.e. converse about interesting things), though I make no claim to be as well read or as excellent of a writer as you.

and I like Fuk u Penguin(sic)

Anyway, the above is partly why I laughed and said to myself: "I've got to follow this girl on Twitter!"

Hope you find some sunshine on your face there in Buffalo, and some light in your soul, and soon enough find your spirits soaring.

Popular Posts