CAN is messed in the head

I was getting ready to leave my apartment for work yesterday, and when I opened the kitchen blinds for the cats, I saw Creepy Asshole Neighbor sitting in his yard, very obviously waiting for me. My first thought was, "Oh fuck, not at 8 AM!" I really do hate confrontation. And he's been going off the deep end lately, yelling from inside his house about me, so that I'll hear him while I'm leaving for work.

It still confuses me so much that he thinks I open my kitchen blinds to stalk him and stare into his bedroom... while I'm at work all day.

I steeled myself for his yelling fit and left the house, ready to tell him to leave me alone for the 50th time.

And he asked me to sign a petition stating that he was a good neighbor.

Can you imagine being brazen enough to ask that of someone you've been yelling at and terrorizing, on and off, for over a year? The audacity!

I was already in fight-or-flight mode, so all I said was, "No, you bother everyone! Don't talk to me." And then I walked away while he shouted, "That's OK, you're only the second person I asked."

Once I got away from him and calmed down a little bit, I had so many questions:

  • Why did he have a petition? 
  • Did he draw it up himself to prove some sort of a point to someone, or is it police- or court-ordered? (Can they order that sort of thing?) 
  • Did the first person sign the petition? 
  • Will anyone else? 
  • Is he dumb enough to ask the woman on the block who has a restraining order against him? 
I almost wish I had asked to see the petition before I said no. Because I honestly have no idea what CAN is trying to accomplish. I would have been able to tell if he'd written it himself, because I know his writing style, due to the large chalkboard sign he propped up in his yard this spring:

I'm not allowed to have my windows open EVER, whether I'm home or not!


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