I wrote this yesterday, when I was in a TERRIBLE mood -
This morning I woke up from one of those dreams that completely colors your day.I dreamed about a girl I used to be friends with as a child, someone I haven’t thought of in years.In the dream, we were both very young again, prepubescent, and she was hanging out with / under the thrall of a much older man.He lived in a seedy apartment that was somehow attached to a bar, and I knew he was bad news.I was watching a movie with the girl, and the man came along, and she left with him.And then I saw her naked, being strapped down to a gurney, and I knew that the man had done something horrible, and she’d killed him.She was catatonic at the end.
So now I’m in a funk that I can’t seem to get out of.
Before that awful week-starting dream, I did have a good weekend.It was very cold in Buffalo – still is – but the sun was out.I was getting ready to meet a friend for coffee on Saturday, and I looked out my bedroom window and saw snow motes swirling around and sparkling in the sun.It was a pretty spectacular sight to behold.
I spent my Saturday night in a cleaning frenzy.We are talking serious cleaning, people. Going through the closet, pulling out things I don’t wear anymore, making a donation pile, throwing out clothes and shoes that I wouldn’t even give away because they’re so ratty.Going through papers and papers and papers, finding out that I have paystubs from my college tutoring days (how long do you need to keep paystubs?Oh, I just looked it up – 7 years).Making files and actually filing papers so that I can find them when I need them.All of this, along with all of the regular dusting and putting things back in their regular places.I hadn’t put laundry away since before Christmas!I get really frazzled when my room is a mess, and now I feel a lot better about hanging out in my room, which is something I like to do.I’m going to hang out there tonight, maybe do some reading.
Yesterday I did a Christmas gift exchange with my friend Ami (I still have one gift to give for Christmas 2009).She got me a sweet bottle of “Bitch” wine… that bottle’s a keeper.I’ll try the wine tonight.In my room.
Anyway, we also played Wii, Ami and Jon and I, and it was great fun.My right arm is aching a little, I think from the canoeing.The archery was awesome.And the table tennis.And the bowling.
Well, I tried to write myself out of the funk, but it’s still here.I’m very tired, maybe I just need some sleep… without the disturbing dreams, thank you very much.